haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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