If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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