that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i think i have two assholes
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
