But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
