Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I think your dad took our porno
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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