i just google imaged poop.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I love how my cats smell like pot.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
