the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
