I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
