so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
