We're facebook friends in real life
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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