what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Randomize
