Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
