1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Omg I joined a choir last night...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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