YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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