After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Is Oprah even human
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
