i would punch a child for taco bell
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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