batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
