Im at strip club and am horny
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
