I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
