This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
