Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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