Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
