My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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