I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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