Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize