its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
