Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
