I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
she peed on how many people?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
