Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
