In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
