Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
