goodnight i made you a song goodbye
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
