i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
