We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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