I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
