Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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