hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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