I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
