I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
