Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Randomize
