bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
