"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I want to make a zoo with you.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
