nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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