Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
