Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
