That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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