good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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