i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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