Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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