he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
