Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize
